Staying Healthy in Retirement
Get Real Guys – Prostate Cancer Screening – Essential.
A serious message from “The Sage Grandad” Have Prostate Cancer Screening Guys, it’s a killer.
You know what, for a few months men have been private messaging on FaceBook about prostate cancer suggesting we should only share this with other men friends on FaceBook. Prostate Cancer Screening is essential.
Well – I think this is total Idiocy.
Why do I say this?
Well – I have been there, got the teeshirt.
So, lets get less heavy about this.
Yeah, prostate cancer is scary, but more so, men are such sensitive souls when it comes to dealing with stuff that involves their manhood.
Prostate Cancer now kills more men than women with breast cancer.
Guys this shit can kill you if you ignore it.
Unlike testicular cancer, you can feel your balls to check for abnormalities, easy peasy when you are showering.
Prostate cancer though, it can creep up on you, have prostate cancer screening, it’s a simple blood test.
These are the signs to look out for.
You gotta be aware if you start pissing little and often, have to get up at night to pee or find it difficult to pee.
And for fuck sake, keeping it to a man only thing – stupid.
It was my wife who spotted that I was starting to have to get out of bed in the middle of the night and suggested I have a simple blood test.
Well, I did this and at first my GP called me in and said the test was borderline and we should keep an eye on it.
So I was having 3 monthly tests and there was a gradual increase.
My first biopsy which came back negative, so I continued with the blood tests and each test showed a gradual increase in the likelihood of a positive diagnosis.
I was admitted for another biopsy, this time under general anaesthetic and bingo – they found it on the other side of the gland.
Long story short, I was scheduled for surgery to remove the prostate.
Now heres the good bit.
I had to have a fitness check as the procedure was for 6 hours and heads down, yes the table is tilted at a 45 degree angle to make access easier for the surgeon.
They found I had a serious heart issue, I had no symptoms at all, if it had failed – curtains.
You gotta be positive guys the big C saved my life.
Now for the funny bits.
When you have the op you are catheterised, yup, a pipe up your willy.
You have to have this there for about 3 weeks.
When you go back to outpatients to have it removed.
You sit in a room with other guys and a nurse is giving you instructions on pelvic floor exercises so that you don’t piss your pants after having the pipe up there for so long.
You may think these are only for the ladies, but you need to do them, if you laugh, you leek.
Yes, after 3 weeks of just emptying the bag, you forget how to switch you’re dick off, hence the exercises.
The good thing is, instead of a dribble, you piss a lot higher and get them fly’s on the wall.
Now for the even funnier bits.
When you are diagnosed you are put under the care of a specialist nurse who puts your mind at rest when you get the bad news and this follows through as aftercare.
So, you have had the op, they have had you in to remove the catheter, then the follow up starts, and you are sitting there being asked questions like, are you getting an early morning erection.
I have to tell you that when they remove the prostate gland, it damages the nerves that cause your erection.
Heres the thing, they tell you there is medication (Viagra) and there is also a suction treatment.
Well – I nearly fell of my bloody chair.
The long and short (not talking about my dick), because of my impending heart surgery, I wasn’t allowed to get excited.
The good news.
I had the heart surgery and was told this could add 10 plus years to my life.
It don’t get better than that.
Thanks for reading my blog.
Ken “The Sage Grandad”